Tuesday, March 27, 2018

Where is the sunshine??

   My grandson Matt with Hot Rod winning the high point in his age division at the first horse show of the season. I wanted to go but it was cold, windy, and really damp even had a few snowflakes thrown in. Where was the sunshine? It is only 41 degrees and cloudy today. The sunshine makes the body feel so much better.
   I went to my youngest grandson's band concert last night. It doesn't seem like he should be going to middle school this fall. He is so tall and only 12 years old. He will become a teenager this August. All grandchildren just grow up to fast.  
  I rode with his other grandparents who live not far from my apartment. When coming home one of the parkways here in town we saw seven deer. It was drizzling as I walked back into my apartment. 
   Matt's love is his horse and he has his first track meet the Tuesday after Easter. I am going to get to go to it and I hope the weather cooperates. He and his mommy are coming Friday to take me to lunch and go with them being I didn't get to go to watch him ride. They have a new puppy at their house a border collie named Bode. He is cute and adorable. They had had a rough year losing both their corgi and blue healer. Their mommy said that she didn't want another dog, but they think she will fall in love with him given time. The corgi was her dog. 
   My oldest grandson started a new job. He decided that he didn't want to go to school. I don't think that he really knows what he wants to do. I know when I was his age I didn't really know what I wanted to do. 
   I have so much to do with the death of my husband. I knew it was coming as his liver was shutting down and it finally happens. I know that you say you are prepared, but you are truly not. I can only take it one day of a time and one step at a time. I don't know if I will eventually go home after I get through completely rehabbing my leg or not. A lot of unanswered questions.  
  Take care and I hope you all have warm weather and sunshine. I hope the weather man is right we are supposed to get to 60 degrees tomorrow.

6 comments:

bj said...

Dear Shirley....I didn't know about your husband passing. I so know what you are feeling...what you are going thru. Did you know my sweetheart of 57 years, Mr. Sweet, passed away last July ? He was doing wonderfully for being 83 and then in Feb., they discovered he had brain cancer...5 months later, he died. I couldn't believe it...even after 8 months, sometimes, I still expect him to come thru the door. Such a shattered heart...
Please take care of yourself and know that my thoughts are with you.

Susie said...

Shirley, You have been on my mind. I pray for you. I can't believe your grandsons are growing so quickly. I see my three great grands growing and I feel like I am missing so much in their lives. I would love to see them at least once a week. LOL. I am glad you get to go see what all your grandsons are involved in. I love that they love horses and take care of them. Get well soon. Take your time deciding what you want to do about everything. I don't think we can prepare for the loss of loved ones. Hugs. Blessings to you and your family, love, xoxo, Susie

NanaDiana said...

I have thought about you so much, shirley. We knew my dad was dying for 11 years and were still not really prepared when it happened. I don't think you can every really prepare your heart for the death of a loved one.

I am so glad you have grandchildren to brighten your life and that you live close enough to be a part of their lives. That is a true blessing.

Take good care of yourself and just take the after-death business one step at a time so it doesn't overwhelm y9u. Love to you- Diana

Blondie's Journal said...

I had no idea that your dear husband had passed. My heart is hurting thinking of how you must be feeling. You were also in the accident and away from your home...how terribly sudden all this was.

I am so proud of your grandsons, and how they have you participating in their lives. They really love and appreciate you, and I hope that fills a huge space in your heart.

I'm sending love and big hugs, Shirley.

Jane c

Quinn said...

I don't think we can ever be prepared even when we know death is inevitable. At least, that's been my experience.
It takes time to grieve, and there's just nothing we can do to get through it easy or quick. Take care, Shirley. And let your family take care of you, too.

Mereknits said...

Thinking of you Shirley. I know it is tough every day for you but especially with Holidays. You have been on my mind. Take good care of yourself.